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Mar 14, 2005
I need this to get me through
can't resist and don't want to
believe it I know it's true
I can't beat and don't want to try
perfect hell
it's more to me than you ever will know
down here where the rest of us fell
waste away with nothing left to show
while I'm in this perfect hell
obsession has begun
possessed by destruction
how did I get so low
believe me no one knows
sometimes I can't hold on
and no one can help me
now it's got a hold of me
I don't think I can make it through this
now it's got a hold of me
the less I do the more it makes no sense
I'm walking pollution who's drained by delusions
on the verge of destruction I cave in to abduction
thin blood I'm bleeding my pulse won't stop racing
just as my heart explodes
no chance that I could win
too hard to not give in
I just don't feel the same
cause I'm the one to blame
sometimes I can't hold on
and no one can help me
now it's got a hold of me
I don't think I can make it through this
now it's got a hold of me
the less I do the more it makes no sense
I need this to be myself
it feels like I need some help
it's too late to save myself
or it's just in my head
now it's got a hold of me
I don't think I can make it through this
now it's got a hold of me
the less I do the more it makes no sense
now it's got a hold of me
I don't think I can make it through this
now it's got a hold of me
the less I do the more it makes no sense
theres that and more, any on Sum 41's new CD "Chuck" i can relate to right now, thats just the strongest at the moment.
Posted at 07:12 pm by spring90
Permalink
Mar 12, 2005
I'll make my own way
I'd make my own way
don't bother counting on me
loving me
just stand back I'm gone
oh this sorry joke
you're a joke
is all we really need
there's nothing that I'd need
too late and too bad
I'm stuck feeling bad
without you I'm a mess without you
just don't know
this is really not a joke
you're all I really need
you're all I really need
and I'm just so bored of wasting my time
love and death are always on my mind
and I'm just so sick of wasting my time
love and death are always on my mind
I'll make my own way
I'd make my own way
don't bother kissing on me
loving me
just stand back I'm gone
oh this sorry joke
you're a joke
is all we really need
there's nothing that I'd bring
and I'm just so bored of wasting my time
love and death are always on my mind
and I'm just so sick of wasting my time
love and death are always on my mind
i just keep listening to that song, and its so true...
Posted at 08:39 am by spring90
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Mar 11, 2005
Hit the ground
Weighed down again
You walked out
I'm sure you're my friend
It must have been good
This can't be for good
Everyone's....
Is everyone ok
I waited, oh I, oh I, waited, oh I, oh I,
oh I must be too dumb to be proud
Because I waited, waited, hey, oh I
Woke to sounds
prayed you were there
fell back down
But I'm sure you still care
It must have been good
This can't be for good
Everything's oh....
Is everything ok
I waited, oh I, oh I, waited, oh I, oh I,
oh I must be too dumb to be proud
Because I waited, waited, hey, oh I
waited, waited, hey, oh I
oh I must have been bored and not telling I,
I must have been bored
waited, oh I, oh I, waited, oh I, oh I,
oh I must be too dumb to be proud,
Because I waited, waited, hey, oh I,
waited, waited, hey, oh I,
waited, waited, hey, oh I,
waited, waited, hey, oh I
i just figured that thing there out, now i need to get over some crap. so lets just say IM NOT ALRIGHT
Posted at 12:02 pm by spring90
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Mar 8, 2005
I'll be coming home
just to be alone
Cause I know you're not there
And I know you don't care
I can hardly wait to leave this place
No matter how hard I try
You're never satisfied
This is not a home
I think I'm better off alone
You always disappear
Even when you're here
This is not my home
I think I'm better off alone
Home, this house is not a home
By the time you come home
I'm already stoned
You turn off the tv
And you scream at me
I can hardly wait
til you get off my case
No matter how hard I try
You're never satisfied
This is not a home
I think I'm better off alone
You always disappear
Even when you're here
This is not my home
I think I'm better off alone
Home, this house is not a home
Ths house is not a home
I'm better off alone
there we go, now everyone knows how i feel about my famly/parents etc...
Posted at 05:26 pm by spring90
Permalink
You don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I won't let go 'till it bleeds
Wish I was too dead to care
If indeed I cared at all
Never had a voice to protest
So you fed me shit to digest
I wish I had a reason
My thoughts are open season
For this I gave up trying
One good time deserves my dying
You don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I won't let go 'till it bleeds
Wish I'd died instead of lived
A zombie hides my face
Shelf forgotten with it's memories
Diaries left with cryptic entries
And you don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I won't let go 'till it bleeds
You don't need to bother
I don't need to be, yeah
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on, once I hold on
I'll never live down my disease
i havent used this in awhile, when i really should have been... so right now, im really sorry. the song says it all. if i feel better i might come back.
Posted at 11:53 am by spring90
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Mar 3, 2005
I can be anything that you want me to be
A punching bag, a piece of string, oh
That reminds you not to think
I found the note down in your car
And its not your fault it gets this hard
Gets this hard
Hold your head high
Don’t look down
I’m by your side
Won’t back down
You wanted a hero tonight
Well I’m not made of steel
I’m not made of steel
But your secrets safe with me
I can be anything that you want me to be
A holy cross, some sympathy, oh
That reminds you not to bleed
I found the note down in your car
And you climbed up here to fall apart
Fall apart
Hold your head high
Don’t look down
I’m by your side
Won’t back down
You wanted a hero tonight
Well I’m not made of steel
I’m not made of steel
But your secrets safe with me
No...
Your secrets safe with me
They knock you down
I’ll pick you up...
They laugh at you
I’ll shut them up
But I’m not made of steel
But I’m not made of steel
But I’m not made of steel
But your secrets safe with me
Yeah
Your secrets safe with me
But yeah
Hold your head high
Don’t look down
I’m by your side
Won’t back down
You wanted a hero tonight
i wish i had someone like that, thats how i feel right now. im also very happy because i got 6 new CD's and i went to a concert that was really great. thats the only thing thats keeping me from being totally happy, the fact that i have noone that would say that too me...
Posted at 12:22 pm by spring90
Permalink
Mar 2, 2005
Song #1:
Wish I was too dead to cry
A self affliction face
Stones to throw at my creator
Masochist to which I cater
You don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I won't let go 'till it bleeds
Wish I was too dead to care
If indeed I cared at all
Never had a voice to protest
So you fed me shit to digest
I wish I had a reason
My thoughts are open season
For this I gave up trying
One good time deserves my dying
You don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I won't let go 'till it bleeds
Wish I'd died instead of lived
A zombie hides my face
Shelf forgotten with it's memories
Diaries left with cryptic entries
And you don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on
I won't let go 'till it bleeds
You don't need to bother
I don't need to be, yeah
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on, once I hold on
I'll never live down my disease
Song #2:
How do you feel
How do you hate
How do you wake up with the smile that’s on your face
Out on the moon
If I was an astronaut could I get back to you?
I’m out of my head
I’m out of excuses so I’m staring at the bed
And it’s you
It’s you...
I hold on, I hold on
(I can’t let go)
And you don’t know how I feel
Hold on, I hold on
(I’d sell my soul)
And you don’t know how I feel
Losing my heart
Losing my pride
I’d burn our initials in the sun if it would shine
I need a fresh start
I was in heaven until this one fell apart
Out on the run
Out on this empty space since all of this begun
I try
I try...
I hold on, I hold on
(I can’t let go)
And you don’t know how I feel
Hold on, I hold on
(I’d sell my soul)
And you don’t know how I feel
Hold on, hold on
(I can’t let go...)
And you don’t how I feel
And nothing seems to help
And nothing seems to work
And nothing isn’t beautiful
I’m old enough to take all the blame for all of us
There's all the games and all the faces
I’m bleeding by myself and I’m okay...
Hold on, I hold on
(I can’t let go)
And you don’t know how I feel
Hold on, I hold on
(I’d sell my soul)
And you don’t know how I feel
Hold on, I hold on
(I can’t let go)
And you don’t know how I feel
I hold on
(I can’t let go...)
And you don't know how I feel
Song #3:
Today's a reason for living
Today's the blood from a stone
Today's a light from a candle
Helping us to find our way home
Today we carry each other
Today the past is a freak
Today's a time for forgiveness
You were never that good to me
(Welcome to this world of mine)
I'm sorry, I can't lie
I'm wasting too much time
Drowning I've been blind
But I've opened up my eyes
Sorry, I can't lie
So I just say goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye
Yeah
Today's tasting the honey
Today's the strike of a match
And today's the lines in the pavement
Helping us to find our way back
Today's the crosses we carry
Today's the strength that we need
And today's the hand of an angel
You were not the kind to believe
(Welcome to this world of mine)
I'm sorry, I can't lie
I'm wasting too much time
Drowning I've been blind
But I've opened up my eyes
Sorry, I can't lie
So I just say goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye
Yeah
Oh what a day, oh what a day, oh my God
Oh what a day, oh what a day, oh my God
Oh what a day, oh what a day, oh my God
And oh my God, and oh my God, yeah
Today we carry each other
Today we do what we should
Today's a time for forgiving
Today I wish I could...
I'm sorry, I can't lie
I'm wasting too much time
Drowning, I've been blind
But I've opened up my eyes
Sorry, I can't lie
So I just say goodbye, goodbye, goodbye
Another bye, goodbye, goodbye
Another bye, goodbye, goodbye, yeah
Another bye, goodbye, goodbye
Another bye, goodbye, bye
Song #4:
There’s nothing you can say
Nothing you can do
There’s nothing in between
You know the truth
Nothing left to face
There’s nothing left to lose
Nothing takes your place
When they say
You’re not that strong
You’re not that weak
It's not your fault
And when you climb up to your hill
Up to your place
I hope you’re well
There’s nothing left to prove
There's nothing I won’t do
There’s nothing like the pain
I feel for you
Nothing left to hide
Nothing left to feel
I am always here
When they say
You’re not that strong
You’re not that weak
It's not your fault
And when you climb up to your hill
Up to your place
I hope you’re well
What you want
What you lost
What you had
What is gone is over
What you got
What you love
What you need
What you have is real
It's not enough
It’s not enough
It’s not enough
It’s not enough, I'm sorry
It’s not enough
It’s not enough
It’s not enough
It’s not enough...
When they say
You’re not that strong
You’re not that weak
It's not your fault
And when you climb up to your hill
Up to your place
I hope you’re well
It’s not enough
No
It’s not enough
It’s not enough
does anyone know how i feel? or is that enough?
Posted at 05:41 pm by spring90
Permalink
Feb 27, 2005
Somewhere there's speaking
It's already coming in
Oh and it's rising at the back of your mind
You never could get it
Unless you were fed it
Now you're here and you don't know why
But under skinned knees and the skid marks
Past the places where you used to learn
You howl and listen
Listen and wait for the
Echoes of angels who won't return
He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why
You're waiting for someone
To put you together
You're waiting for someone to push you away
There's always another wound to discover
There's always something more you wish he'd say
He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why
But you'll just sit tight
And watch it unwind
It's only what you're asking for
And you'll be just fine
With all of your time
It's only what you're waiting for
Out of the island
Into the highway
Past the places where you might have turned
You never did notice
But you still hide away
The anger of angels who won't return
He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why
I am everything you want
I am everything you need
I am everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
I say all the right things
At exactly the right time
But i mean nothing to you and i don't know why
And i don't know why
Why
I don't know
Posted at 07:26 pm by spring90
Permalink
ok, this blog here is turning int some freaky alternate reality or something... i don't know. i just havent been doing what i set out to do... i feel fine.
Posted at 03:51 pm by spring90
Permalink
Feb 25, 2005
I'm coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I'm falling asleep
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke
And she's taking a drag
Now they're going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head
But she's touching his-chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go
I just can't look its killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
'Cause I'm Mr Brightside
I'm coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss
Now I'm falling asleep
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke
And she's taking a drag
Now they're going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head
But she's touching his-chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, let me go
I just can't look its killing me
And taking control
Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibi
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
'Cause I'm Mr Brightside
I never...
I never...
I never...
i relate
Posted at 04:11 pm by spring90
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How Im Feeling
What im doing
Hey, this is my new thing here, it’s a Blog, but not a “what I did today” its more of a “What im feeling today” sort of thing. It goes hand in hand with my other Blog, but Im not going to have comments, im not going to have a tag board. I don’t want to know if your reading this, I don’t want you to mention anything I say in here, and I don’t want any subscribers. Pretty much a “read only” thing. Some of you may know me by my Blog, but some may not. Im better known as “spring90" to most of you, I think. And I will leave it at that. I will use peoples Username’s as how I know them best.
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